the good...the bad...and the ugly

I've become BEYOND frustrated with my mission to "get thin in 2010". Once again this week, the scale didn't move in my favor. I'm feeling tired, overtrained and defeated. Obviously, weight watchers doesn't work well with the intensity of workouts that I've been doing. I've stayed well within my points allowance and burned 3600 calories at the gym last week. It just doesn't add up! Having been down the weight watchers road before, I know what works. I lost a little over 30 pounds in 7 months following the plan and doing two aerobics classes a week (plus walking around the neighborhood when the weather allowed). That's what I'm ready to get back to. I've been working out at a pace that's not realistic for the long-term because I actually "thought" it might help jump-start the weight loss again. I can't feel totally defeated because my body has changed. I've gone down 13.3 inches since November, but on the other hand, I feel like other things and relationships around me may be suffering as a result. Spending almost 8 hours a week in the gym leaves little time for much else, and I do have some guilt leaving my little guy in the nursery there that often (although he really does enjoy it). I do believe that I should be eating more when I work out at such a crazy pace, but it all just gets too confusing for me. How much to eat? When to eat? What to eat after workouts? What to eat before workouts? Too many variables for me. I want to know how many points I can have a day, work out just enough to make me feel better and spend the extra time doing things I *love* and that make me happy :)

I've spent the last week mentally decluttering....trying to get my priorities straight again, and I know what I want to do for sure now. I've always been easily influenced, and all of the information has caused me to doubt myself and think I'm doing the wrong thing. So, here I go again. One day at a time.